Crap I Learned from a Kid Free Vacation

June 4th-8th my husband and I took a kid free trip. I am not going to tell you about all the AMAZING shit we did, or post a crap load of Vacation pics. Instead I am going to tell you about all the random crap I learned while I was away from my kids and society as I know it, and out in nature.

• 3.5 miles is far when you are hiking. So is 9 miles. We hiked 3.5 miles and back one day, all uphill on the way there. We hikes 9 miles another day.

3.5 miles up 1000 ft and back down!

9 mile loops 

• Don't wear perfume while hiking... unless you want bees for friends.
• Having zero kids nagging you is relaxing no matter what you choose to do. I didn't even miss them (that much)!
• Hot tubbing in the rain with a view of lake superior is a life changing experience. Even when it is crowded with a bunch of overweight people!
• Fish Tacos taste good. I mean actual fish tacos here, so get your mind out of the gutter perverts! I used to avoid them just so I wouldn't have to order them! I did not know what I was missing! I now have lived.
• Almost no one has cucumber vodka. I found it at a place for the second time ever. Heaven is the only way to describe it.
• Hiking trails should have out houses.  I peed outside more times than I care to admit. Damn post childbirth bladder!
• Stupid TV and a 1030 bedtime is bliss. I watched a lot of things I never heard of and actually enjoyed myself.
• I don't care about internet as much as I thought.  My phone had zero bars the majority of our trip. I only used WiFi at night and did not even miss Facebook (that much) during the day. Turns out, I am only on so much IRL because my life is so boring. Who would have guessed?

I did pray for WiFi at the hotel though

• Fresh air makes you tired. Its not just something dumb your grandma says after all! 
• Sweat makes my hair nice. I skipped washing it for 3 days after hiking because it just looked fab! Who knew?
• I am not as out of shape as I thought. The day after our 9 mile hike I was only a little sore and the day after our 7 mile hike almost non existent soreness.
• I would be buff if I could hike that much every other day all summer. Too bad there is no local hiking trails here.
• Exercise causes better digestion. I was regular this whole trip! Very uncommon for me. Amazing!
• Hotel lobby coffee is just as good as gourmet...as long as you add a shitload of sugar and flavored creamer.
• I am AWESOME at choosing restaurants, hotels, and hiking trails. Not to brag or anything. OK...you got me, yes I am bragging.
• This window is evil! Who thinks of this stuff anyway? I got woken up from this shit at dawns early light each morning. Good thing we were only at this resort 2 nights!

That's about it. What did you learn on vacation?