Sunday, June 4, 2017

Thirteen Reasons It Could've Been Me (but wasn't)

In my last post Thirteen Reasons Why I Hated This Show, I talked about why this show was not my cup of tea. Many readers may have thought "What does she know? She probably can't relate to being raped or bullied. She probably had a perfect life growing up." I am here to tell you that is not so. I had much worse happen to me on top or being raped and bullied. My ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences) score was very high, yet I made it through somehow and am a well-adjusted and productive adult.

Here are my 13 reasons why it could have been me but wasn't:

  1. Age 9-my sister and father both died suddenly within 6 months or each other.
  2. Age 12/13-all of  7th and 8th grade my sister and I had the nickname lesbian twins.
  3. Age 13-my mother remarried.
  4. Age 14-witnessed stepdad being arrested for selling marijuana.
  5. Age 14-my first sexual experience, never even been kissed, and I was raped by a boy I just met that day. The next day at school I earned the reputation of being easy, since I would sleep with someone I just met. 
  6. Age 14- earned the nickname "black and decker pecker wrecker". I made out with a much older boy and when he went to school the next day his neck was covered in hickeys. OOPS! 
  7. Age 14-I got wasted and was molested in the back seat of a car by a 7th grader.
  8. Age 15-Black and Decker guy had sex with me at a party immediately after having sex with my friend. I didn't know at the time and actually thought I was his girlfriend. At school, I was teased about "sloppy seconds". 
  9. Age 15-got my first real boyfriend, gave him sex and blowjobs willingly only to be dumped 2 weeks before prom. He took one of my friends instead. I spent 2 weeks crying in bed. Everyone at school still thought I was slutty.
  10. Age 15- had a one night stand with Black and Decker guy. The next day he went to school and told everyone I smelled like tuna.
  11. Age 16-I was raped for the second time. 
  12. I witnessed drug/alcohol use in my home throughout my teens.
  13. I was called stupid bitch almost daily throughout my teens.
This is not my whole story, just 13 things that could have pushed me over the edge but didn't. I don't know how I made it through all these events, but I do know I was not going to lay down and quit at life. I knew logically all of it was temporary and would be over when I graduated and that then I could start over. I am happy to report that I have a very happy life, 5 gorgeous kids and a great husband of 20 years!

Do you want to read my whole story? If so tell me in the comments. I just may write a memoir of my life.