Friday, May 22, 2015

My Son Wears Pink Shoes and I Don't Care

What is more important to you, letting your kids have freedom of expression or wanting them to follow the gender norms that society has set? Take this quiz to find out?

T      F      Boys should not get their ears pierced.

T      F      Only girls should take ballet.

T      F      Only boys should be in Football.

T      F      Boys should not have long hair.

T      F      Girls should not shave their heads.

T      F      Boys should not wear nail polish or makeup.

T      F      Dresses are for girls.

T      F      Boys should not have dolls.

T      F      Boys don't cry.

T      F      Girls should cover up more when swimming with boys,

T      F      Girls need to do all the cooking and cleaning.

T      F      My Little Ponies are girl toys.

T      F      Trucks are boy toys.

T      F      Pink is a girl color.

T      F      Girls are not made to do manual labor.

If you answered more true than false, letting your kids have freedom of expression, regardless of what gender the behavior has been assigned to in today's society, is not that important to you. If you answered more false than true, your child's freedom of expression is more important to you than the gender norms society has set. I think boys have it the worst in this area, because people don't think much of it if girls wear boys clothes and short hair, but it is a big deal if boys wear girls clothes, and have long hair.Many people do not let their boy do typical girl things because society says it's not okay. Society decided what is okay for boys and girls, so society can change what is acceptable. If enough parents stand up and let their kids be who they are instead of trying to fit the mold, these typical girl things will become more acceptable for boys to do, because we are society! In his youth my husband painted his nails, wore eye liner, and had long hair. My son used to paint his nails and had long hair. He collects ponies and wants his ear pierced. I let him be who he wants to be without labeling it. His younger brother is now trying some typical girl things, growing out his hair and wearing pink girls shoes. I let him. I have the same rules for my kids whether boys or girls. Makeup, ear piercing, hair styles, clothes, all the same rules. More parents should stop worrying about society and start thinking about what makes their kids feel more comfortable with who they are. If they learn before adolescence how to avoid doing things just to fit in, maybe they will be able to avoid some of the things teens are pressured to do. They won't just do something because everyone else is. Kids being allowed to be who they are teaches them how to not care so much what others think of them and not to do things just to fit in. My oldest boy got very good at telling people he didn't care what they thought of him, and that he just liked his hair long. I think it's pretty cute on him too!

Tell me what you think. Do you have the same rules about appearance for your boys and girls?